When a Child Can’t Tell You What’s Wrong

When a Child Can’t Tell You What’s Wrong

When a child reacts intensely or withdraws, there may be needs behind their behavior that they don’t yet know how to express. Learn to recognize them.

Crying, defiance or silence can catch parents off guard, especially when they don’t know what triggered the response. Instead of rushing to tell your child off, pause, describe what you’re noticing and give them a safe space to respond. In these articles, you’ll find ideas for distinguishing between a child’s behavior and the need that may be behind it, along with simple activities to help start a conversation. It’s not about reacting perfectly, but about building a relationship in which your child feels heard.

Interested in this topic? Read more: Discover the authentic needs of your children: The key to their happiness and development Want to find out where you stand personally? Take a short test at the end of the page and gain a better understanding.

How does this apply to you? Choose the answers that describe you best:

Imagine that your child suddenly stops talking for no apparent reason. What is the first thing that comes to your mind?

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Imagine that your child shows you a drawing that you don't understand at all. How do you react?

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In a situation where a child doesn't want to go to school, your first thought is:

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When your child says they don't like something about you, your emotional reaction is:

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In childhood, you felt understood especially when:

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If your child has a tantrum in public, what affects you the most internally?

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How do you most often recognize that a child is troubled, even if they don't say so?

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If you had to describe the "invisible needs" of children with one image, what would come to your mind spontaneously?

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If a child has a recurring problem, your internal setting is closest to:

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When you imagine the ideal relationship between a parent and a child, what comes to your mind first?

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How to recognize the hidden needs of your children and fulfill them.

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