Professional Relationships Without Collecting Contacts

A relationship isn’t just preparation for asking a favour

Some people picture networking as handing out business cards or approaching strangers to get an advantage. A more useful approach is to build mutual trust over time. A professional relationship can start with a simple question, genuine interest in someone’s work, or an offer of a small favour.

After meeting someone, remember what they do and what interests them. Instead of a vague “Let’s keep in touch,” you could write: “You mentioned having trouble choosing a supplier. I came across a useful approach; I’d be happy to send it over if you like.” An offer is only worthwhile if it’s genuinely relevant.

Don’t pretend to be closer than you are. Not every contact needs to lead to a collaboration. Respect other people’s time, don’t ask for major favours straight away, and don’t promise what you can’t deliver. Being able to say no politely can also build trust.

When you need advice, be specific: “I’m deciding between two kinds of projects. Could I ask you a couple of questions about your experience?” That way, the other person knows what you’re asking for and how much time it will take.

Put it into practice: Choose two people you’ve worked with meaningfully in the past. Send one of them a sincere, specific message without a hidden sales pitch. See if a natural conversation follows.