Tone, pace, and nonverbal cues

Notice the cue, then check what it means

As you explain a proposal, your colleague furrows their brow and falls silent for a moment. You might take that as disagreement, but you don’t yet know what’s going on. Instead of defending your proposal, ask: “Is anything unclear here, or do you need time to think it over?” Their answer will tell you more than their facial expression alone.

A 2019 review of research by Barrett and colleagues notes that the same facial movements don’t reliably have one meaning across people, situations, and cultures. Faces provide social information, but on their own they aren’t an unambiguous guide to a particular emotion. The review focuses on facial expressions; it isn’t a universal dictionary of all gestures or a claim that nonverbal communication doesn’t matter.

On your side, adjust the conditions for understanding. Speak loudly enough to be heard, leave room for a response after an important point, and respect personal space. If you say, “I have time,” but keep turning to another task, explain your time constraints. Then the other person doesn’t have to guess whether they can continue.

Don’t expect everyone to use the same pace, gestures, or amount of eye contact. Rather than demanding a particular display of attention, also pay attention to their responses and ask whether the conversation works for them. If something isn’t clear, you could offer to explain it more slowly or provide a written summary. The goal is understanding, not copying prescribed body language.