Values that meet in a decision

Things that matter can compete with one another

Juraj wants to spend time with his family and develop professionally. He’s offered a place at a weekend seminar that falls on the same dates as a family trip they’ve already planned. Both options relate to something he cares about. Simply naming his values won’t reveal one right answer. He needs to consider his commitments, alternatives, and the consequences of this specific choice.

In this course, we distinguish a value, as a direction for action, from a goal, as a specific outcome. Caring for relationships can be a value; a family trip together can be a goal. Professional curiosity can be a value; attending the seminar can be one way to put it into practice. So choosing one option over another doesn’t have to mean giving up the overall direction.

Clarify a value by considering behavior and its cost. If reliability matters to Juraj, he should take the family trip he’s already agreed to into account. He can also check whether the seminar is offered at another time or whether there’s another way to learn. If he wants to change the family plan, he should discuss it openly and accept that the others might not agree.

Not every conflict can be resolved with a compromise that lets you do everything. Sometimes you have to consciously say no to something. Your decision should also take into account the time and energy available. You don’t have to start by defining a grand, lifelong mission. A more modest question may be a useful guide: “What do I want to prioritize with this decision, and what consequence am I willing to accept?”